Royston Kibaki - Alex

Oh ho ho Royston Kibaki. Born on May the 6th, 1989 in Mombasa (Nairobi is just too mainstream), Kenya this fictional character has brought great joy to my life, Patrick's life and as a matter of fact many of my friends lives. Don't furrow your brow with confusion anonymous reader! This is just me taking the all too frequent opportunity to reaffirm my position at the foot of the social hierarchy. Good ol' Royston happens to be a player I've created on Fifa 11. I just hope that by mentioning him here I've made our Patrick smile. On the topic of football tonight my five-a-side team Hufflepuff Young Boys play our penultimate of this current season. As it stands we sit in the god awful position of third from bottom, but before you despair allow me to elaborate, we're rubbish. Also, we cannot drop one single position whilst we can climb as high as fifth from bottom if we win our two final games and other results go our way. I have a pessimistic outlook though, things won't go our way, we will lose our last two games and everyone will laugh at us. Except the two teams below us that is, we're allowed to laugh at them. I need to go and fill up on carbs so I can do lots of productive running. Peace out.