Newspaper- Paddy

Today I thought I would glance through the newspaper, and find an interesting news story about which to comment upon in my blog. However, upon looking through my newspaper I have decided that that was apparently a crap idea, and so I will be forced to blog about the disappointing nature of news.
There is no good news these days. The paper is always just full of pictures of Kate Middleton, and/or various older female celebrities with their toyboy lovers. The sport is still OK, its just always seems to be out of date by the time its published. Newspapers can no longer keep up with internet based news sites, sites that can update their stories live as they happen. Something that is good about newspapers though is the puzzle section. There is no good way to do a crossword or a Sudoku on a laptop. It just doesn't have the same appeal if you can just put letters/numbers in willy-nilly and delete them again if they turn out wrong. With a pen, and some paper, there is a thrill and a risk of writing a letter in. An irreversible action that could ruin that game forever.

World famous - Alex

Guess who is now a world famous and internationally acclaimed sports journalist? I'll give you a very very obvious clue, it's me.

"Pfffffffft whatever" I hear you exclaim as you ponder why you are even reading this paltry post

Well, look at this http://forums.liverpoolfc.tv/threads/308464-Brendan-Rodgers/page2 you just scroll down a little bit and a certain mister "ForkHandles" (a lovely two Ronnies reference) calls my post from the chapstalkfootball alter ego I post on "interesting" and even lower "LucasIsDancin" refers to my blog article as containing "great info". Get a piece of me!

By the way, I appreciate that I am not actually successful. I just like knowing that what I write is appreciated., you should try making me think that sometime! ZING!

Specs- Paddy

Today, a bombshell that will change the course of my life forever was dropped upon me. It's actually not that bad, I may have exaggerated this piece of news' impact on my future life. I was merely told that I need glasses for scenarios such as driving, or watching TV/Laptop screens. According to a trade professional, I each of my eyes is rated at -0.75. This means I have very slight shortsightedness. It also means that in a couple of days, when I have purchased my new frames, I will be both intellectual in nature and appearance. I will also be rocking hot. Like really hot. I'll look like this guy. He is smoldering at that camera. Alex suggested I get hipster style glasses, such as those a hipster would wear. In his words he said if I had glasses and as long as I "work out a bit and get stubble + tatoos and you will probably fit the normal ideal of attractie." I don;t see most of that happening if I'm honest.

Stolen - Alex

I woke up this morning bright eyed and positive that I wouldn't forget you again and I even knew the topic I was going to talk about. I was going to talk about Sergio Pizzorno's goal for the rest of world team in Soccer aid 2012. However I was beaten to the topic by my Portuguese (not actually) co-blogger Paddy. I have openly discussed how sexy I find Serge in the past (here and also here), and he was fully of making women moist gorgeous rock star sex appeal last night. With his black head band keeping his luscious Italian rock star locks in check, his sleeves rolled up and it actually looking pretty awesome and his socks pulled high up on his gangly legs so that they covered his knobbly rock star knees he had the look of someone who could get you to leap into bed by just saying "Hi". In homage to the goal scoring "axe man" who "doesn't have a club foot" I may just roll up the sleeves on the Kasabian t-shirt I bought when I went to see them live whenever I wear it. However, it's just as likely that I never roll the sleeves up, because it normally makes people look silly.

Ps. Here may or may not be a picture of Patrick that I don't think you'll want to not see

Pizzorno- Paddy

Today was the fourth annual Soccer Aid football Match between a team of English Celebrities and Legends and a team from the Rest of the World. It was a very entertaining game, far better than the actual England Team's game against Norway last night. The final score was 3-1 to England with goals being scored by John Wilkes, Teddy Sherigham and Kevin Phillips for England. However, the RoW's goal, scored by the Italian descended Kasabian guitarist, the man made of solid swagger, the man who is like Noel Fielding would be if you removed the drugs, Serge Pizzorno. It was a truly magnificent goal. I mean, have a gander at this! For a rock star, that is not half bad. he's got a history of it too. I'm sure Alex has shown you all this next clip I will link you, its froma couple of years ago from his appearance on Soccer AM, but its worth another look. It is truly a superb shot. aybe he should find a place in Italy's Euro 2012 squad, or even England's. I'm sure there is a way we can work him into our squad via technicalities or something. I mean, according to the oh so reliable Internet, he was born in Devon, and that's about as English as it gets. We could drop Downing so that there is a space for him, that'd work. Someone call Hodgson.

Outside - Alex

I would like to begin with an apology. I forgot about you on Thursday and for that I can only put forward my most sincere apologies. If you were negatively impacted by my forgetfulness then you are welcome to claim back damages from me in the form of a picture of me doing something really funny.

Today and the last few days the weather has been glorious, so in true British fashion I shall make the weather my topic of conversation. It has been over 20 degrees for as long as my tiny brain can remember and I have also forgotten what a cloud looks like. I haven't even burnt yet, my nose is a little bit pink but for a ginger I am pretty pleased with how my skin has coped with the suns best. I haven't even been camping inside either, as proof here is me in the garden just before I started writing this blog. I may be in the shade, but there' only a tiny corner of sun left in the garden. Also if you look closely at my t-shirt you can see where my nipples are hehe

Last Day- Paddy

Apparently Alex didn't fancy blogging yesterday, and for his incompetence I can only apologise. I, however, am here for you as usual and I am ready to blog your socks off.
Today I had my last ever day of college. I still have to go in for exams and stuff up until late june, but from here on in, there are no lessons for me to attend. For many people I'm sure such a momentous day could be quite moving. I on the other hand felt no real emotion towards my departure from 6th Form College. Maybe its because I had only been there two years, maybe its because I didn't form any real or lasting friendships with my class mates, who knows. Either way, I'm not too fussed about moving on.
On a different note, I have a BBQ to attend later and I am looking forward to having some slightly burnt meat along with supping some chilled and probably alcoholic beverages. It will be a good night. The only downside is that I have developed a slight cold, but nothing too desperate, and have also got a slight pink tinge to my upper arms from prolonged sun exposure. That'll brown up nicely though, given time and attention.

Outside- Paddy

According to Google, it is currently 25°c in my home town of Farnborough. This is OK though, because I have not had college this afternoon, and had the foresight to wear shorts. I am also, and I don't like to brag, currently a God amongst teenage boys. To make the most of the sun in my garden, I have successfully moved my television and xbox outside and set them up with a deck chair. This means I have been able to dominate on FIFA whilst simultaneously topping up my tan. I thought it was so genius, that I felt compelled to tweet about  and text Alex to tell him about my garden-based gaming set up. To round off my scenario into something truly wondrous, I helped myself to an ice lolly and a can of ice-cold coke. I did consider a nice chilled beer, but thought against it for 2 reasons. First I have to do some revising in a minute and can't be anything less than 100% tip-top condition for that; and secondly, I had several beers last night and did not feel so hot this morning. In fact, I nearly passed out in the shower this morning and had to sit down for a bit, still in the shower, until the feeling passed. since then, I have been fine. It helped that college this morning was well easy. We spent 20 minutes in Physics today discussing which superhero franchise was the best, we weren't supposed to, but we did. We settled on the X-Men as best overall due to its good mix of heroes and villains. Batman was considered best individual hero and the best villain was awarded to Venom, much to my disgust.

Loose cannon - Alex

Well yesterday Patrick dropped the first ever proper swear word on Alexnpaddy (to my knowledge). I gasped in horror when I read it, I thought he was better than that. But he appears to have tackled the rules head on and in doing so attained a head injury that made him think swearing was allowed. He's exactly the sort of loose cannon who would drive around a city centre handing out money or instead of buying domestic goods for his mother would buy thousands of pounds worth of toys. But that isn't anyone in particular, I'm only kidding, I'm talking about Mario Balotelli. And on that note here is a picture of Patrick with Balotelli's hair cut.

Snippets- Paddy

This shall be a blog full of random snippets as there are several things I want to mention, but nothing worthy of a full blog unto itself.
First of all http://theuglydance.com/?v=czzxyykcnq. To quote Jay-Z and Kanye West, "That shit cray" and also weirdly addictive.
Second of all, I have a new favourite US President. It used to be Obama, because that man is pure swag. However it is now Lyndon B. Johnson because he has some kickass quotes. My personal favourites are "It's probably better to have him inside the tent pissing out, than outside the tent pissing in" and "If the circumstances make it such that you can't f*ck a man in the ass, then just peckerslap him. Better to let him know who's in charge than to let him think he's got the keys to the car." Obama ain't never said that shizz.*
Lastly, you may have seen this in my Twitter feed just there >>>, I was watching an episode of the US Office, and due to the slowness of my internet it took roughly 2 hours. The episode was only 42 minutes long. I was slightly outraged.










*Yes I know thats a double negative, implying Obama does say that shizz, but I don't really care for the rules of the English language.

Three - Alex

In my last post I went on about how I had set up another blog, and to put a whacky and undoubtedly hilarious spin on it I pretended that you were my significant other and it was like I had cheated on you. I also posted a link to the other blog in which I partake in the writing of, you know many of you clicked on that link? Of course you do, it's the title of this post. Three of you. Out of the 25 of you who viewed the blog that day (25?! We used to get about 60 a day) only 3 clicked the link. How do I know this? Well I looked at the stats on the other blog, and it has four referrals from www.alexnpaddy.blogspot.com, and one of them was me just checking that the link worked! Pat probably clicked the link as well, so I would put the 50 trillion dollars on the fact that only two of you clicked the link. You know how that makes me feel? Not particularly strongly actually, I just needed a topic for this post. Sitting on the toilet and listening to the Beatles I was struck by no bolt of inspiration so I had to wing it and make something up.

You want a chance to redeem yourself?

http://www.chapstalkfootball.blogspot.co.uk/2012/05/champions-league-final-1112-summary.html

Click that link, if you don't read it then I won't mind that much, but I hope that more than two of you bother this time. Two is a paltry effort.

No Football- Paddy

I have 11 minutes in which to do a blog, before I leave and go off to work for the evening. I feel I need to squeeze a blog in now, because if last week is any indication, I won't be able to after. I can't remember if I told you this, but last Saturday I did not finish my shift at work until 2am. Not even I can pass off a blog at that time in the morning as still being on my day.
On a slightly disappointing note for me there were two important football games today. First of all the Championship Playoff Final between West Ham and Blackpool, which West Ham won 2-0, and the Champions League Final between Chelsea and Bayern Munich, which kicks off at 8pm-ish. I did not get to see the playoff final as it was shown only on Sky Sports, a channel I do not get. Instead I had to listen to it on the radio as if it were the 1950s, and then I fell asleep so missed the whole second half. I won't be able to see the Champions League Final either, because I'll be at work. It will be on, but presumably I'll be too busy working to actually watch any of it. I hope work is quiet today. That would me I can just loiter in the front bar polishing glasses and watching the game. That'd be good.

Moon lighting - Alex

I have been unfaithful to you. Sure I feel a bit guilty about going behind your back and treating you how I did, but I did warn you. Maybe if you listened to me more this wouldn't have happened. This relationship has been all one way for a long time now, it's all me me me and you just sit there silent. You never ask how my day was, so I'm forced to guess what you want. I guess I should come clean about what I actually did... Well... I started another blog. BUT! Before you go judging me and muttering swear words under your breath I will justify myself. Firstly it is a blog entirely about football (soccer football, not beef cakes in lots of protective clothing football). You wouldn't want that now, would you? Secondly, it isn't just my blog. Patrick contributes to it as well, two of my other friends help out too (although they haven't actually posted yet, lazy sods). I suppose I should show you it, I hope you approve.

www.chapstalkfootball.blogspot.co.uk

What you see on Alexnpaddy won't change though, don't you worry. You will still get the same senseless drivel from me every other day. So how are you affected? Well you're sort of not. If you want to have a butchers at the other blog you're welcome too, in fact, I'd quite like you to. I guess I'll speak to you in two days then, I'm sorry baby, I do love you.

Politics- Paddy

Alex and I both recently went on voteforpolicies.org.uk  and did their survey to find out which political parties we most support the policies of. Its a good survey, you should have a crack at it. It takes roughly 20 minutes, but is very interesting in its outcome. I'm sure you all want to know how your two favourite bloggers stand politically, so here were our results. Alex is aligned politically with 44% of Labour's policies, 33% of the Greens', 11% Liberal Democrats', and 11% of the Conservatives'*. This means Alex has a slightly left of centre approach to politics apparently, far from what his middle class roots would lead you to believe. I myself received rather more upsetting results. I got 11% from each of Labour, Conservative and Liberal Democrat, 22% from UKIP (The UK Independence Party), and a whopping 44%  aligned with the BNP, the British Nationalist Party*. I am basically, and for all intents and purposes, a Nazi. I am not happy about this. It means Alex and I can no longer be friends. I am 77% aligned to right wing/ centre right parties and am therefore more or less Hitler. Alex is 88% aligned to left wing/ centre left parties and so is basically Karl Marx. Our friendship would never work.






*I know that only equals 99%, but I was working to 2 significant figures, which had I been bothered to include the decimals would have made it to 100%.

Whoops - Alex

I got into bed, closed my eyes and then thought to myself "shoot, I forgot to blog". I'm not going to hide my devious side, a large part of me did consider not blogging and then doing so when I had woken up in the morning. But alas Patrick would not be happy with that, and he tells me off sometimes because of my lack of Alexnpaddy based enthusiasm. So here I am, in the dark and trying to force my brain to think of something witty, whimsical or whamtastic. So for the umpteenth time an Alexnpaddy blog will be full of talking about how I can't think of any content. So, my day. I went to college today and did a proper official Maths exam, then a proper yet unofficial history mock, a Maths paper done with a partner and then learning about cloning. The only thing of any real note that I have done this evening is play some 5 a side football. I did some good tekkers, I did some bad tekkers. Mainly average tekkers though, and I'm not too sure if they exist. Anyway, time to go and dream. Who knows, maybe I'll dream about average tekkers and be able to confirm that they do exist!

Timetable- Paddy

As of Monday, my college timetable improved a great deal. Why? Well, it is coming up to exam season as I am sure you all know, but before my exams begin, the first years have their AS exams. This means that on Monday, all the first year students started study leave to enable them to do more revision and so all AS classes have stopped. Obviously I myself was, despite being an A2 student, partaking of the AS Economics course. This means I have no more Economics lessons ever! I now have no lessons on Monday mornings, no lessons on Wednesday afternoons and only 1 lesson on the whole of Thursday! I am quite pleased with this development as it has granted me more free time in which to have lie ins and/or naps. Oh, and to do revision for all the exams I have coming up, obviously. Thats clearly the main benefit of this extra free time. Not the sleeping, eating and FIFA time it grants me. However, my new and improved timetable will only exist until Friday 25th May. This is not so sad as it seems. Friday 25th of May is my last ever proper day at college. After that I have study leave, exams, and then nothing. Until September that is, when University beckons...

Comfort eating - Alex

I am currently being towered over by a heap of food wrappers that rises high above me. I jest and exaggerate, however in the past 15 minutes I did, in the style made popular by locust plagues all throughout history, ravage through the kitchen, acquiring along my travels a gold chocolate bar, a blackberry and apple nutri-grain bar, a chargrilled chicken flavour packet of McCoys crisps and a cup of coffee. Why am I down in the dumps? Well Patrick blogged about it yesterday, it is the dramatic fashion in which the carpet was pulled from underneath Manchester United's metaphorical feet. How did I react at the time? Well upon the full time whistle I stormed upstairs and sat on the toilet with my heart in my mouth. That sounds disgusting, I assure you that it was all very sanitary. However, whilst I was on the bog distraught I was texting one of my friends and between the two of us we formulated how Manchester United knock Manchester City off of their nice and expensive perch.

1 - Sign Gregory Van Der Wiel from Ajax. www.transfermarket.co.uk suggests that he would be worth 10 million euros, which is roughly 9 million pounds. So because we have to pay more money for players than we are worth we would probably have to fork out 14 million pounds for the full back.

2 - Send Rafael Da Silva out on loan to a club in the Premier League to gain match time

3 - Sign, in decreasing preference, Kagawa, Gotze, Eriksen or Modric.

4 - Sign, in decreasing preference, M'Villa, Tiote or Rodwell.

5 - Gain more points than any other premier league team in the 12/13 season.

Title Winning- Paddy

In roughly 40 minutes I will be watching the last Match Of The Day of the 2011/12 season. It is a sad occasion. I am looking very much forward to it. There were many very exciting games today, deciding many important positions in the league. Most importantly, the Premier League titled had to be decided. This was especially thrilling as Manchester City had to win in order to hold off perennial contenders Manchester United. In the 90th minute, Manchester City were trailing 2-1. However, it was at this point Manchester City were awarded 5 minutes of inury time, something that if it had been given to United would be called "Fergie Time". During this 5 minutes, Manchester City scored twice to clinch the league title and snatched a 20th title from United's grasp. To quote @MarioBaloteLAD, from twitter, " Definition of irony: City winning the league in Fergie time." I am inclined to agree with him. I haven't spoken to my Manchester United loving counterpart, but I imagine he isn't best pleased. Ah well, he'll get over it. They can always win next year...

Sun - Alex

Saturday the 12th of may 2012. The sun is shine-shine-shining and it is a baking 13 degrees outside. Well my phone says that it is 13 degrees, I was outside in the back garden this morning assembling various pieces of garden furniture that will enhance my enjoyment of the garden in the coming warm weather filled months. After finishing off the table I sat down on one of the newly assembled chairs in order to have a few moments respite after a sweaty morning. This is when it dawned upon me, reclining in the warm weather and the sun shining down upon me, "I am far to pale to be enjoying the sun". I was far too warm and I could feel my skin crisping up nicely like a pack of pork scratchings. So after that I came inside, nice and sheltered from the offensive sun, and I popped open a chilled can of cola, jumped onto the sofa and turned on the television in order to enjoy the nice weather the only way that I know how to. Hiding from it. I hate the sun 90% of the time. In fact, the only time that I do like the sun is when I am playing football in it (not actually in the sun, that would be hugely impractical), and it isn't too hot. That's it. That is the only time that I can properly put up with the sun. Says the boy who is going to Africa for three weeks in just under two months. Great.

Excuse- Paddy

Now, I was supposed to do my blog at least 33 minutes ago (as of writing this sentence), however, I got somewhat distracted. What distracted me? Well, it was a combination of Alex my co-blogger, FIFA 12, and the US adaptation of Ricky Gervais' hit comedy The Office. How did each of the distract me? Well Alex played several games of FIFA with me until roughly 11pm. He won most of them and it upset me a tad so I couldn't blog. To console myself I played 3 more games of FIFA 12 after he left. I won the first 2, but lost the third, and consequently through away my chances at winning the league. This meant that I remained somewhat upset. So, at 11.45 I thought "I know I'll watch an episode of the US Office. Thats a comedy and will therefore cheer me up." However, episodes of the Office are roughly 21 minutes long. I watched 2 of them. This took me until roughly 12.30, which was the time at which I realised I needed to quickly bang out a blog, before this situation became irredeemably bad. I think I have just about managed. Thank God (or any major or minor deity or equivalent of your choice) for that.

Thor - Alex

Thursday - named so after the god Thor. Originating as "Thor's day", Thursday is a day which full of nothingness for me. The day starts at 6:45, as all week days do for me. By 7:05 I was showered and tucking into some pan au chocolat and slurping like a bum crack bearing builder on a cup of coffee. After a nice relaxing morning and two poo-poos I left the house at 8:35 and then did boring college stuff until 4:15 when I got to leave college and come back to my place of residence. Upon returning home I just milled about for a bit, accidentally showed my friend my penis and had a cup of black coffee. WHAT?!?! I hear you say. Yeah, I know I just said it pretty matter of factly, but I like black coffee. I know most 18 year old boys wouldn't be sipping black coffee whilst eating fine cheese (I have my own favourite fine cheeses). The only thing that detracts from how classy I am is that I eat fine cheese and sip black coffee on the toilet with my pants around my ankles. My mum and sister say that it's gross.

Akinator- Paddy

http://uk.akinator.com/#
Go on that. Its a 20-questions type deal, in which the internet tries to guess the identity of a person real or fictitious through questions you answer. It does ask more than 20 questions usually, but it is incredible. I'd hazard a guess that it works out the person I am thinking of well over 95% of the time. It has guessed some truly obscure people too. Tigris, a character from the third Hunger Games novel who is mentioned on about 5 pages total. Bigger Jaws, Peter from Family Guys' idea for a spin off from Jaws. It even identified the Exclamation Mark that pops up to offer advice in the game Theme Park World. I'm pretty sure that Akinator, the web genius, is the biggest piece of evidence I have ever seen for the existence of sorcery and/or witchcraft. It is insane. Go on, try it again.

Funtimes - Alex

So, funtimes. Three things for me to say about funtimes.

1. After giving the album "funtimes" by the young british band "The Heartbreaks" I am impressed. I would recommend laying your hand upon a copy, maybe only figuratively though, as obviously the market for digital music is on a constant rise and the CD may becoming somewhat of an extinct media form. But that debate doesn't fit under the light entertainment and very occasional humour umbrella that Alexnpaddy is attempting to shelter under, so I shall leave it at that.

2. The next few weeks will not be "funtimes" for me. I am sure that I have mentioned it enough times for you to know that I have exams that will no doubt decide my future encroaching upon me at a rate which worries me.

3. What actually might be "funtimes" is the leavers ball for which I must purchase a ticket today. It has everything a boy like me would want to celebrate leaving college. And just to keep things clear, everything a boy like me wants is food, delicious beverages, be they alcoholic or not and an opportunity to wear a suit. Mainly the suit thing though. Mmmm suits.

Ps. If you happen to be high up within the Manchester United, make sure that you change the kit for the 12-13 season. I refuse to support a team who wear a bloody chequed shirt.

Today- Paddy

I did have an awesome and big and funny blog lined up for today, but its now too late for me to do one like that successfully. Also I didn't actually have anything planned for today. I just forgot a bit.
So I will tell you about my day!
From 00.00 to 11.30 today I slept. At 11.30 my mum came into my room, woke me up and asked if I wanted waking today. I said not until midday and went back to sleep. At 12.00 (midday) I woke up properly and then put some clothes on and did my hair and other such things. I had breakfast. At 12.50 I went into town because it a friend's birthday yesterday so we were going out for lunch as a gang. I went to visit the bank, but it was shut because it is a bank holiday today. At 13.00, my friends turned up and we went to a pub. I stayed at the pub until 16.00, during which time I consumed £20 worth of cheap, but tasty food and drink. I arrived home at 16.15 and revised physics for 1 hour. I then had a nap from 17.15 to 18.30, because I am lazy. Then I had dinner. I watched an episode of Big Bang theory with dinner. And this took me until 19.15. I then did nothing for 15 minutes and started politics revison at 19.30, continuing until 20.30. After that I played several games with Alex on FIFA, which took me up to 23.00.
And that is all I have done today.

Paul - Alex

I am like Paul the octopus. Well in many, many way's I am not like Paul the octopus, the two most obvious being that I am neither named Paul nor an octopus. However, way back when I made a prediction which has come true. Well all but come true. And only half of the prediction has come true, but that's besides the point. Right, look at this blog...

http://alexnpaddy.blogspot.co.uk/2012/01/welcome-to-2012-itll-be-no-different-to.html

go down to May and you will see that I predicted that Manchester City will win the Premier League title. This hasn't technically happened yet, and they can't do it with record points. But this has shown that, without doubt, pessimism will never fail.

Charlton- Paddy

Today I went to see Charlton Athletic play their final game of the 2011-12 Football League One Season. They won it, and by it I mean both this game AND the 2011-12 Football League One. It was, all in all, quite a good game to be a Charlton fan. The game itself was against Hartlepool, who for uncertain reasons had 200 fans turn up dressed as smurfs, and ended 3-2 to Charlton, who came back from 1-0 down at half time. Obviously, this win granted us 3 points and thus our season's total was 101 points. Not bad going at all. After the game the trophy was presented and many of the Charlton team's children were allowed onto the pitch to celebrate. However, for several very small children, this was of no interest and the advertising boards were clearly far more important. This behaviour from them amused me and so I thought I'd share it with you, although you probably had to be their to get the full effect. After I had left the stadium I spent a whopping £9 on a t-shirt commemorating this momentous footballing occasion. This is £4 more expensive than a similar t-shirt I bought when I was 8, last time Charlton were promoted. Bloody inflation.

Dictionary - Alex

Intro - Greet reader and thank them for taking time to read

Hello, you little rapscallion. I'd just like to say a big thank you to all of our readers for their continued enrolment in the list that is Alexnpaddy readers. I mean that from the bottom of my heart.

Para 1 - Talk about the new words I have learnt

In the last couple of months I have learnt a few new words, and because I am an incredibly dry person I think I'll use them as the basis for this paragraph. I'm just going to tell you what the words our, to tell you what they mean would be to ruin the fun of discovering new words! Word number one is "obsequious". Word number two is "countenance". Word number three is "hyperbole". And saving the best for last, number four is "abhorrence". the only clue you are getting is that you probably feel a strong sense of abhorrence towards me and Paddy.

Para 2 - Apologise

Now I would like to apologise to you, whilst I may have broadened your vocabulary by four very swanky words, I haven't provided you with much in the way of light entertainment. So to make up for that, here is a picture.

Voting- Paddy

I am now a fully participating member in the political process of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland. To put that more simply, I voted for the first time. If I'm honest, I found the process fairly underwhelming. All I had to do was put a cross in up to 3 boxes next to the name of the potential candidates. It was fairly dull, and if I'm honest as it is only the local council elections the outcome isn't really that exciting. I did, however, choose to place the maximum of 3 votes for 3 candidates. I had a choice of 3 Conservative representatives, 3 Labour representatives and one lonely Liberal Democrat representative to choose from.
BRB, my Dad wants me.
Back! He wanted me to make some drinks for dinner.
Now, I bet you're all dying to know who I voted for. Well, that's personal and I'm not going to tell you. I'm joking, I voted for the Conservatives, all three of them. Why? It'd be pointless to vote for anyone else in my locality, they always win, and also I am middle class.

Dope - Alex

Wilfred Zaha is my new favourite person. Will. I. Am of Black Eyed Peas fame would probably describe him as "dope". That is because A. Wilfred Zaha is dope. And B. Dope is Will. I. Am's favourite word. Out of every word there is, dope is his favourite. Why is Zaha dope? well 44 goals in 14 FIFA ultimate team appearances for me makes him dope. You know who else is dope? This little playa

http://www.youtube.com/watch?NR=1&feature=endscreen&v=T5I98OcegL0

4 years old and already producing music better than 80% of the stuff than my little sister listens to. having said that, this is a tune..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJO3ROT-A4E&ob=av2e

I'm only kidding, it is an awful song. Just catchy. So catchy. But what's my opinion worth? I mean, I'm insecure... Not sure what for. I'm turning heads when I walk through the dooo-ooo-oooor.

I like posting links in my blog, I like to think that it extends the time you spend entertainmently influenced by yours truly. Reem.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljcqNORe3F0&feature=results_video&lr=1&ob=0

Never Give Up- Paddy

The title of this blog is a message to Alex. He should not give up or our little blog. He should not be disheartened by the slight decline in page views, or by his own inability to think of what to write. I am sure that one day our blog will pick back up again, and we will become famous. Alex himself even once said to me something along the lines of "if we keep doing it long enough, eventually it'll get big." I intend to stick to that train of thought, and it would be nice if Alex were to continue with me. Otherwise, I'll have to remove his name from the blog and it'll just be called 'n'Paddy and that makes little to no sense. Also, the remainder of you left reading this blog would undoubtedly leave at that point, making it an even greater time until my celebrity star will rise. And the time for Alex's star to rise will be at an almost infinite amount as he has no chance of becoming famous outside of the internet, where people of his ilk and welcomed and revered instead of shunned as they are in real life.
Right, I will leave you all now. Please continue to read, get your friends to read it too. I don't want Alex to stop and abandon me.