Born a winner - Alex

As I look back on my short empty life I notice one disappointing correlation, as my years grow I seem to be able to achieve less and less. When I was little larger than a garden gnome I was as bright as Sirius A, I sat on the bench for what was a relatively high level football team and I hadn't developed ginger hair. When I was seven I was the first runner up in a local Kumite karate tournament, what I believe to be the foundation for my speed, presence of mind and agility. A year later I repeated this accomplishment, but in a higher age group, hence I was required to spar with boys twice my weight.  By the age of 11 I got test results that were as close to perfect as possible, and my imitation of Goku unleashing a kamehameha was faultless. At the age of 13 I was Cove Rangers most sporting player for the 06-07 season, not an easy feat by any means. When academic testing came around again aged 14 I did pretty well, with the highest English score out of all 200 students in my year. Fast forward to the end of the end of the same school year and my English grade was below average, evidently an extra 9 months of teaching did me no good. My other results still kept me well above average over all though. My quest towards being the next David Beckham had taken a hit as well, I was stuck in the bottom division after a nasty knee injury and nor was I physically attractive. As I turned into a man I had to sit my GCSE examinations, and the results I acquired sat me comfortably in the top quarter of students nationally, but far from the heights that 11 year old Alex would have reached. And then to 3 days ago, where I was put through the stress of receiving another set of important test results, and BAM I'm average :( I hope everyone learns a lesson from me, just because you're annoying, unattractive and socially inept it doesn't mean that karma kicks in and makes you good at anything else. Damn you karma.