Yesterday Patrick informed you of his sacking from his managerial mode on Fifa 11, he even told you about his spending of £100 million on bench warmers. This demonstrates that Patrick is rubbish. Whilst Football Manager 2011 is a slightly different art than Fifa I am still hoping to impress you with a quick summary of my first season as Darlington. We won the league - by over 20 points. We were the leagues highest scorers, as well as having the tightest defence in the league. We also won the unheard of FA trophy. My actions in the transfer market were so successful that the star striker I brought in for free is wanted by Blackburn Rovers, that's right, a conference striker wanted by a premier league team. Most readers will be bored of this so I'm going to go into the other reasons I am better than Paddy;
1- I am better at being strong
2 - I am better at spotting bunnies
3 - I am a better word make-uperist
4 - I am better at being not mean, although I'm still a horrible person
5 - I fit in better with vampires due to my pale complexion, so if vampires take over the world I am in a better position to be one of the final humans left than Patrick is
6 - My hair is more of a talking point than Paddy's
7 - I have better legs
8 - I have neater eye brows and eye lashes
9 - I don't tell you I'm going to do a blog at three in the morning and then not do that!
10 - I'm more commited, when I write lists I get to double figures
There you have it, I am sure as hell better than Patrick at the ten things I wrote on that list just up there. So hopefully that makes me better overall? If there's any uncertainty I guess we'll have to fight it out, Harry Hill style.
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