Prepare to have your mind blown, this shiz is heavier than Inception. The time is currently 22:50 on the 1st of April, and as the odds are that you're not simple I won't go on to explain that in fact it has been uploaded at a morning or evening time on the second of April. Charlotte as and when you get confused by the numbers and words feel free to text me seeking help understanding words, punctuation and their use together, I know what it must be like to be brainly challenged so I'm only here to help. P Diddy's character in the popular comedy film 'Get Him to the Greek' would refer to this scenario as a "mind naughty f word", because I'm effectively talking to you in future tense, whilst you're in the present and I'm in the past. Well I'm in the past for when you are now, as it stands I'm in the present for me. CRAZY. Do try to cope though, don't look too far into it either, not that I would expect you to, no one who reads this genuinely cares. Our blog has become a sheer money-making tool, and as time has progressed we have lost the pure artistry that just coursed through our veins. No longer do we paint mental pictures comparable to the Sistine chapel, and no longer do we tickle your brains with the wit and dry humour that made us so successful in the first place. For this I am sorry, I for one pledge to try to reminisce back to the days when you enjoyed our blogs. When they weren't a chore to read.
Oh and by the way casual reader, on Thursday Patrick appeared publicly to try and convince people to vote him into the powerful position of student president. I don't want to upset him by telling you how it went, and technically he could still win (PAH), but I hope this fills his little head with rage and makes him clench his fists. Poor little sausage.
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